


I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead

by ouzell



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Blood, Cannibalism, Death, Disease, F/F, F/M, Gen, Gore, M/M, Plague, Sickness, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-03
Updated: 2015-10-02
Packaged: 2018-04-07 10:03:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4259208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ouzell/pseuds/ouzell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Setting: The Meteor</p>
<p>There’s a disease that has infected one of them. They don’t know what it is and they don’t know how to stop it and it shoots terror through their hearts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. "To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine."

Kanaya Maryam has not slept one night since it has progressed to choking up blood, and the bags under her eyes worry the others. Throughout the night she sits busily scratching at paper and jabbing the keys of her grubtop, fighting a battle that has manifested itself in a body.  
Drops of blood adorn the pillow that Rose’s head rests on like a constellation of painful cherries in snow. She is restless throughout the night, her illness progressing so quickly over the past couple days that Kanaya has become frantic trying to figure out what it is. There are no human diseases that her symptoms coincide with and she only just started on troll diseases that morning. She would have broken down crying in her room had she not made a breakthrough. An ages old sickness that was ancient history in her culture. Scrolling through horrible pictures depicting madness akin to human rabies her gag reflex reminded her of its existence.

How could he let this happen- how could Karkat Vantas let his team down? True most of them had died and others had joined them to form his current team, but nevertheless they were a team and he had a duty to keep them alive and well. Unfortunately he was not doing well upholding that duty well. Rose had gotten some stupid sickness, Kanaya was going mad trying to cure it, or at least find out what it was, and everyone else was doing god knows what. Probably lazing around like dumbasses waiting for this to blow over.  
Stupid stupid STUPID.  
At first he had thought that it was just a fever or some shit that she would get over. Being nursed 24/7 by your alien girlfriend was probably a lot more fun than writing down the complete history of how all your friends died. Hell, he would have preferred anything over that. What a depressing wordfest of superiority.  
But he had to feel some sympathy after it got really bad. In fact he felt awful- he should have had people wash their hands more, he should have had Gamzee take a shower every once in a while, he should have made sure all the food prepared was washed and germ-free. Or something. Maybe that would have stopped what was to come from coming in the first place.

Stuck on a meteor with a dying Rose and a bunch of sad people was not Terezi Pyrope’s idea of fun. No longer would anyone add on to can town with her, no longer would anyone indulge her fight for justice, and no longer was anyone in the mood for anything humorous. There was a thick layer of melancholy smog over everyone on the meteor, and it was incredibly boring. Sure, she felt bad for Rose-they were hatefriends after all-but who made a rule saying that there couldn’t be some fun made while someone was suffering a possibly terminal illness? Maybe one last attempt at holding court would prove successful in raising some spirits.  
Skipping down the hallway leading to one of many storage rooms, Terezi made sure to make enough noise to let the others know she was having a CRAAAAAAZY amount of fun. Not really. The silence left behind by the tragedy and threat of death was kind of a buzzkill. Taking a breath and renewing her psychotic smile, ‘Redglare’ burst into the courtroom. Doctor Honeytongue waited patiently on their side of the court. Unfortunately, having killed off most of her scalemate friends and foes she no longer had anyone to prosecute or execute, so all that remained were her forensics team, and they would never betray her due to impeccable character.  
This would be her last moment alone free of terror.

Ignored and alone was not how Gamzee Makara wanted or expected to spend his time during their trip on the meteor. Then again, he hadn’t expected himself to go on a killing rampage either. He was sitting on what was left of his horn pile, no longer finding it so comforting. There is a grim truce between him and Kanaya. She seems to tolerate him, for the sake of the others. Terezi ignores him mostly. Dave just seems awkward around him. Rose tries her best to act politely. The only one who truly acts friendly toward him is Karkat, and there is still a partition of unease in the air between them.  
But now that Rose was bedridden and seemed to be getting more and more feverish, he felt that he had to do something to help. Maybe this was his chance at becoming something other than “that motherfucking murderous juggalo.” Unfortunately he didn’t know anything about medicine or helping someone who was sick. So far all he had done was brought unwanted Faygo to Rose, and he knew he wasn’t helping. Everyone was particularly down for the last few days, and he was definitely not doing anything to help that.  
Gamzee decided to stop moping. Being optimistic was an important part of maintaining his positive character- or at least the one he used to maintain. Putting a lazy smile on his face, he walked out of the room and started down the hall. Maybe there had been some developments.

His sister is dying and he can do nothing about it. Dave Strider the coolkid is losing his cool. How could someone get so sick in just three days? She’s coughing up blood for god’s sake. You can no longer hold a full conversation with her due to her being delirious half the time- and Kanaya won’t let him near her for fear of him catching it as well.  
And he couldn’t do anything about it.  
All he could do was sit around and wait for her to get better- which was not working. Trying to look like he was fine and sure that she was going to get better was not easy. He wasn’t eating well and the slight bagginess of his hella comfortable Knight of Time pajama pants is not his style. He is not some unsophisticated ruffian who walks around with his pants at his ankles!  
Oh what the hell is he doing this isn’t even funny anymore. Sitting up from his pile of blankets and pillows on his bed, Dave rubbed his hand down his face. This was tiring, waiting. Waiting for Rose to get better. Waiting to get to wherever the hell they were going. Waiting for Kanaya to find out what the sickness even was. Waiting for something he could do to fucking help! A jolt of pain electrifies his right hand and ran up his arm. Punching the wall in anger is not the smartest thing to do, but it helped. A little. Knuckles bruised and bleeding lightly, he leaves the room, slamming his door.  
A jar falls from one of his shelves onto the floor with a shatter- alcohol and a post-mortem shrew escape sending a foul smell into the air.

The taste of iron sticks to Rose Lalonde’s taste buds like the stench of a skunk lingers unwanted. She knows she is dying, and she knows that finally taking that journey would not do anyone well.  
During her imprisonment in her bed, Rose had thought about many things. She had thought about the pain, yes. But she had also thought about the other more disturbing symptoms she had been feeling. The feverish fits she suffered frightened her- when she tried to explain them or discuss them with others they waved them off as connected to her illness- they thought that she was delirious. She was to keep it a secret against her own will.  
The hunger she felt was what frightened her the most. It coiled around her stomach like a snake, whispering darkness to cloud her mind.  
She was not so easily persuaded.  
When they still considered her sane and listened to her words, Rose had requested no more visitors. Of course Kanaya had been puzzled and with carefully selected words insisted that she at least be able to nurture her. There was no possibility of her winning that battle. That was when she had refrained from acknowledging the itching feeling she had whenever she looked at another. Thought of the meat on their bones. It disgusted her.  
And she knew that soon she would no longer be able to hold back. There was a limit to her strength, both physical and mental. Her body would not be able to fight off this disease for much longer and her mind would snap along with it. All she could hope for was that Kanaya would be able to handle it, that she might be able to live on without feeling guilty.

Kanaya could feel that lump in her throat developing into more. Developing into a full-on sob, like a storm you cannot stop. What she had discovered was terrible and it was breaking her heart in two.  
You see, trolls had contracted this disease many many years ago, and it had simply vanished one day, much like the Bubonic Plague that humans suffered long ago. Symptoms included going mad, attacking others without conscience, uncontrollable coughing, weakness, and eventually death. But that wasn’t the worst part.  
The worst part was that two of the symptoms were reanimation and cannibalism. Tales of palemates devouring each other, of matesprites disregarding their relationships in madness.... this is what met her eyes. The disease didn’t affect the trolls any longer due to being exposed before, but upon contact with humans there was no stopping it. Dave could become sick any day now.  
Could the trolls still be infected by means other than airborne pathogens? She took some relief from the fact that she had kept Rose separate from the others, though it wasn’t her idea. Soon Rose would no longer be Rose and she had no way of knowing when. Kanaya had to do something had to help her fight it- a cry resounded in her ears. Rose was calling out for her, panic making her voice waver.  
The troll’s heart trembled.


	2. "I love her and that's the beginning and end of everything."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've found that reading this while listening to Sadstuck makes it especially sad. :)) Just a pro tip.

The blood on Rose's pillow was no longer just droplets. It was leaking out onto it now in a steady current of ruby colored death. Strangled coughing came from the frail body that contained Rose Lalonde, a horrible portrait of pain. Kanaya rushed forward, turning her onto her side with panic. She stayed silent in her shock. What was she supposed to do? As far as she knew there was no cure- no way to stop this. No way other than... Oh god. She sobbed, face twisted in grief and terror. Terror over what she was going to have to do. Rose lay pathetically on her side before her, one hand dangling limply over the bed. She moved her bloodshot gaze to the jade-blooded troll. Her brow was furrowed- she had accepted it. Her bloody lips mouthed the words, 'Kill me.' Kanaya stepped back, the back of her hand over her mouth, eyes wide in fear. Unconsciously she shook her head just the slightest bit, her other hand going to her skirt pocket. Her slender fingers wrapped around her lipstick. "Rose..." A tear drop fell from her eye, leaving a glistening trail down her cheek. She sniffed, put down her hand, and set her face.

Rose closed her eyes. 'I'm ready for death.' She had danced with him for too long, never touching, but nevertheless moving so closely she could have if she wanted. From the look in Kanaya's eyes she knew. She knew that Kanaya knew what was wrong with her and what needed to be done. 'Kill me.' That was what she had said and that was what she was waiting for. For the one she loved most to kill her- to put her out of her misery. 

His steps echoed in the silence. Well, they did until he reached the door of the room that Rose was in. There was a cry. He definitely had heard a cry. Opening the door quickly Gamzee stepped in, expecting to see Rose wanting water or something. Instead he saw her, bloody and suffering on her bed. Kanaya was standing in front of her with her back turned, hand still in her pocket. "What the motherfuck is goin' on here?" He was genuinely concerned, but Kanaya regarded him as if he were simply a pesky bug buzzing in her ear.  
"Go away Gamzee. This doesn't concern you." Her tone was cold, unfeeling. He could practically feel the chill of her voice. A shiver ran through him. Then she finally took her hand out of her pocket. She uncapped it. There was the sound of a chainsaw engine revving as the lipstick transformed into one. Gamzee's purple eyes glanced from Kanaya and her chainsaw to Rose, sick on the bed. "You're not gonna kill her, man!" He stepped forward, not really wanting to cross paths with Kanaya's chainsaw, but not willing to let her just kill Rose either. He didn't ask himself why Kanaya would kill her own matesprite, all he knew was that he didn't want anyone else to die. 

Kanaya showed no sign of emotion save for the tears running down her stony face. "Move aside, Gamzee. I said this doesn't concern you." Behind him, Rose stirred. He shook his head. "No- I can't let you all up and motherfuckin' murder her!" His yelling echoed out of the room. Kanaya's fury boiled under her skin. More movement from behind him drew her attention. Rose was moving to stand. Fear shot through her like a thunder bolt. "Leave- now!" Her expression went from anger to panic. No matter what she said, Gamzee would not move. "GAMZEE!" She moved forward, raising her chainsaw over her head to bring it down in his direction.  
Shocked, he moved to the side and toward the door, still watching her. She was bringing the chainsaw down, but it didn't hit him. No, it hit Rose. Rose's pale arm. Her eyes were glazed over and emotionless, blood splattered over her. It wasn't Rose any more.

Dave thundered down the hall in the direction of Kanaya's voice. Gamzee had done something. He was killing everyone again, wasn't he? His sister was in there. Helpless. Thoughts sped through his head, faster than he could keep track. Almost like in slow motion, he stopped at the doorway, eyes widening in horror. Kanaya had her chainsaw blade buried in his sister's arm, and Gamzee was standing to the side, not killing anyone at all. Dave nearly screamed his words, "KANAYA WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" His sister. That was his sister. She turned her head to him and her face fell. In that moment- that split second of doubt- her fate changed drastically. Rose pushed forward, grabbing Kanaya's shoulder and sinking her teeth into it. A piercing scream resounded in their ears. The troll tried to push her off as she spoke, frantically trying to move away from- no, not Rose. From the Walking corpse. "Get out of here! Go!" Gamzee turned and fled, but Dave was glued to the spot. His legs wouldn't move. He could only watch with his mouth hanging slightly open. "Dave!" Kanaya sobbed, "Go!" 

His consciousness broke. Dear god. His knees finally bent and he turned, fleeing from the room. Tears streaked his face. His sister wasn't dead, but she was something else. Had she gone insane from the pain? From the suffering? The loneliness? He had left her all alone. Alone in that pit of darkness. A vision of Rose attacking Kanaya flashed across his mind. Blood soaked her sheets. Her face showed no feeling. He shut his eyes and shook his head, running into the nearest room he could, slamming the door shut behind him and sinking down against it. Dave put his face in his hands, salty tears blotting his shades. "Oh god.. oh god oh god-"

Sitting across the room with her hands on two of her scalemates, Terezi gave him a curious look. "Dave? >:?" She didn't get up, but she could smell his salty tears. The cherry red smell of blood drifted in. "What's going on?"

He jerked his head up, still franticly terrified. "Terezi- oh god, Terezi- Rose is... She attacked Kanaya. Kanaya's still back there-" He meant to move forward but fell onto his hands and knees. Dave's sunglasses clattered to the floor, little droplets falling to the gray floor. "What do we do-"

 

Gamzee- alone again. He had gone back to his horn pile. It was still big enough to hide in. A silly thought, but he found it to be safer than running around trying to find everyone. Breathing heavily among the horns, the purple-blooded troll found himself panicking. His hands shook and he found himself twitching ever few seconds. No. No no no. With effort, he held his hands, trying to keep them from shaking. No, he wouldn't lose control. He wouldn't let hmself slip up. Not again. Right now he needed to stay sane. Or at least sane enough to stay safe- to others. The sound of shuffling made him freeze. No, not just shuffling, scraping. The sound of scraping metal. He was next. He was next if he didn't do something. It got closer- scrape step step, scrape step step, scrape step step. Grabbing at the floor beneath him, he felt his fingers brush against something. Finding it again, he closed them around it. A stick... no. An arrow. Guilt panged in his chest. Equius. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath.  
His eyes snapped open. The shuffling had stopped. He gulped and looked to the side out of the corner of his eye. A shadow had fallen over the pile. Gathering up his courage, Gamzee charged out of the pile, arrow in hand, plunging it into whatever it was outside the pile. It fell to the floor, and so did what it was carrying. His eyes focused.  
Gurgling came from the troll he had attacked. Kanaya. Her face showed hurt. That she was scared. She had been looking for someone else and he had stabbed her in the neck. The arrow was more than half way sunk into her neck- there was no way she would live. Blood poured from her mouth. Her chest heaved as she tried to breathe.  
Gamzee was crouched over her, searching frantically for a way to fix this- to fix her to take back what he had done oh god what had he done? "Kanaya..." She tried to lift up a hand, but dropped it. Her eyes were wide, still suffocating on her own blood.  
He was a monster. He was still a monster. She would never be able to forgive him now and it was because he had killed her. Had done exactly what everyone had expected him to do. He shook his head. Her eyes were starting to fade- eyelids starting to droop. "No... no-" Her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she went limp. The last thing he had done was call her a murderer, and here he was. Holding her dead body. He did this.  
The sound of footsteps reached his ears. He didn't even bother to look up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Title is an F. Scott Fitzgerald quote.
> 
> Will try to update more often!

**Author's Note:**

> Title is a quote by Sylvia Path  
> Chapter Title is a quote by Henry Ward Beecher
> 
> Believe it or not I somehow got the idea for this from Bob's Burgers! Kind of. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading and continue to do so!


End file.
